Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Things I am NOT...

afraid to keep running Windows XP- I don't need Microsoft's support or approval.

the ideal weight for my height

completely convinced we have walked on the moon- I mean I'm like 99%, but some of the footage does look a little sketchy.

sure why Caddyshack is the best golf movie ever made and Caddyshack II is the worst- just the worst

about to stop watching House of Cards- Kevin Spacey was born for this role and Robin Wright is delightful.

intolerant- except for when it comes to lactose and hippies

overwhelmed- I'd say I've got just the right amount of whelm.

understanding how Rolling Rock can have such a smooth, drink-ability, while Rolling Rock Light has notes of sweat and a "foot-ish" aftertaste

gay- but that Matt Lauer is a handsome man

aware that the pick up line "Do you work at Dick's? Cuz you're sporting the goods" has ever not been well-received

fully insured

violating my restraining order 

the guy that cut you off on the way to work this morning- A lot of people drive late-model Ford Fiestas, so back up, friend.

**If there is something you are NOT, e. g., a fan of this blog entry, feel free to comment.  The Snark community is a mostly judgment-free zone.
Next post is lucky number 40!



5 comments:

  1. ...sure this buffalo urine extract is really going to help me grow hair back

    ReplyDelete
  2. ...convinced that NO ONE heard me sneeze just now. I know you people heard it and are simply refusing to say "bless you". Show some blarting decency- I HAVE FEELINGS!

    ReplyDelete
  3. ...aware of the number 40's good fortune.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ...sure why Will continues to doubt the power of BUE. I mean, look what it's done for his upper lip.

    ReplyDelete